I woke up far too late for my accomplishing all of my plans today but that didn’t seem to bother me as I grabbed first things from my closet, made a sandwich and walked out on the streets of my city, heading to one of my favorite places. I am sitting at my desk, writing this post, listening to music. Today I will take the opportunity and relax a bit, enjoy doing stuff I want. I’m alone and it’s very peaceful, silence filling the rooms around me. I turn the music on and slowly volume it up a little. Even though it’s a sunny day I am listening to the music I would listen to when it’s cloudy or rainy afternoon. I am trying to make comics as I decided to get back on that track. I also decided to start making cartoons, unfortunately I spent last few days hopelessly trying to find the right software for it and to download it. Shadows of stickers hung up on my roof windows are visible on my desk as well as a shadow of a pacing bird from time to time. I decided to draw or paint something, whatever comes to my mind, whether it is inspired by a song or I randomly thought of it. I am escaping the world and the pressure I felt in last few days. Couple of friends invited me to come to their countryside houses but I can’t be on two different places and parts of country at the same time and I need a rest. I need a rest from everything, from constant running and doing things, I just want to give a little time to myself. I said that I will do it this summer and I finally felt the need for it, therefore I am going to catch it. I really wanted to go and I always want to, but I just couldn’t this time. When you’re there for people they will love you and respect you, appreciate what you do for them (some more, some less). But when you can’t be ‘red cross’ 24/7 for them then all of a sudden you’re not good enough. People actually don’t understand that if you don’t hear yourself you won’t hear them either, therefore you won’t be able to help them and they won’t be able to help you, because you haven’t tried to help and listen to yourself in the first place. It’s like a magic circle. I am always there for everyone, no matter how tired I was, no matter how much I just can’t put up with their problems, I’m there, but they need to cherish what you do for them and you need to cherish yourself in the first place.
As I said, I am taking a rest from everything, taking in the peace. I decided to give up on drawing comics today due to lack of inspiration, I will draw for my own soul. Enjoy the playlist:)